Introducing Micah Mitik Esden

This blog post is long overdue but things have been a whirl-wind since we got the call that we had a court date and needed to be in Ethiopia in a little over 1 week.  To bring you all up to date before sharing the details about our trip, Jana and I were not expecting to travel for court (our first Ethiopian trip) until October.  Courts close in Ethiopia in early August and the timeline just wasn't working in our favor.  Low and behold, we got an e mail telling us that somehow we were able to get a court date but needed to be in Ethiopia in just over a week!

We didn't even have time to process what was happening before we dropped Callie and Elena off at Jana's aunt and uncle's and boarded a plane to D.C. with a connection to Addis Ababa, Ethiopia.  We were lucky enough to have an overnight stay in DC and since neither Jana nor I have ever been there, we made sure to rent a car and drive downtown to see all the major sites.  The white house, Lincoln Memorial,  and the Washington Monument were all on our list and able to be visited before it got too dark.

The next day it was back to the airport for a later morning flight direct to Ethiopia.   The flight was 13.5 hours and allowed us time to get our heads together for what has become one the most incredible life-changing experiences of our lives.  Neither Jana nor I were able sleep, either because of sheer excitement or the fact that there is something that feels so unnatural about being in a giant plane flying over a huge ocean for such a long time (Nerve racking!).  We landed at 7am Ethiopian time (midnight east coast) and were exhausted.  Navigating the airport and baggage claim area was our first exposure to just how different life is like in Ethiopia in comparison to the States.  In general in America we have grown accustomed to organization and structure, something that was lacking with the simplest tasks like getting your luggage or forming a line to move through customs.  Once to the airport exit, we met Woudneh, our agency's director on the "Ethiopian side."  We had heard a lot of great things about this guy and all are true.   He proved to be one of the most sincere, patient, altruistic people I have ever met and is truly committed to the orphan and the adoption process in Ethiopia (the man does not take a day off...literally).

After leaving the airport, we were immediately exposed to life in Ethiopia.  In retrospect I am not sure what I was expecting to see.  Jana and I of course read about Ethiopian culture, history, and economy, but little can prepare you for extreme poverty and the severe living conditions.  I won't spend much time describing all that we saw (homeless men, women, and children, hungry children begging for a meal, livestock running free throughout the roads, extreme exhaust from overcrowded roadways....the list goes on). We were immediately brought to our guest house and given just enough time to drop off our luggage before we were told we would be heading to the transition house to meet our son.  The transition house is about 40 minutes away and is where all the children available for adoption stay as they transition from orphanage life to living with their families.  This was a weird 40 minutes.  We were dealing with complete culture shock, were severely jet legged, and had literally just met 3 other couples also coming with us to meet their children for the first time. It was exciting and completely terrifying at the same time.

After arriving at the transition house we had about 5 minutes to get prepared.  So many things were going through our heads.  Would he look like his picture?  How would he react?  How would we react?  Should we go right up and grab him?  Will he be nervous?  Before we knew, it he was there.  A nanny came around the corner holding him.....the cutest, most perfect, quiet, special, largest 11 month old I have ever seen.  I know I just stood there, partially so as not to startle him and make him uncomfortable but also in shock that this was finally the moment we had been waiting for.  Jana snapped out of it before me and following her motherly instinct walked in, offered her hand, and got him in her arms.  Of course the moment was perfect in every way, well as perfect as it can be with 6-8 strangers watching one of the most personal and unique moments of your life but I would be lying not to say there was also a little bit of shock, specifically with how large he was.   We had only seen 1 photo of him before our meeting, and Callie at 11 months was certainly not as large in comparison.  We didn't know for sure until a few days later when we weighed him but Micah weighed in at a whopping 25 pounds.  After meeting him we spent the next 2 hours getting to know each other.  He crawled, played with toys, and laughed.  He was quite yet curious and interested.  Such a special moment for us.

Each day we were there, they allowed 2 hours a day for us to play with our children.  This was hard for us as we wanted to be with him as often as possible but we grew to understand why they do this.  There is of course a lot to do while you are there (trips to orphanages, appear in court, etc) but they also don't want you to form too strong of bond yet have to leave your child for 3 months until the adoption is cleared by the US Embassy.  We made sure that the times we were together we took video and pictures as much as possible and enjoyed each moment.

The orphanages:  On our second day in country, our group was able to visit the orphanages where our children came from before being brought to our agency's transition house.  This was a few hours drive south to a smaller city called Adama.  We visited 3 different orphanages and were able to give donations like soccer balls, diaper cream, diapers, etc that we had all brought from home.  Each orphanage was a little different but all were filled with incredible kids happy for just a little attention or someone to play soccer with.  Micah's orphanage was one of the last we visited.  We were greeted by the woman who runs the orphanage and were told that Micah was one of her favorite children she had ever cared for.  We were able to visit for at least 45 minutes, and she told us about how Micah came to the orphanage, about his time while he was there, and she even showed us the crib he slept in.  She also made a loaf of bread that we cut in Micah's honor to celebrate his adoption into our family.  It was truly special.  There were also some younger children, maybe 4 or 5 years old, that Jana and I played with.  They were so captivated by our cameras and phones.  Seeing how excited they were to push buttons and watching them gather around us was one of the more memorable moments of our trip.

Court:  Passing court was probably one of the easiest parts of the trip.   We really didn't know what to expect.  We were just old to dress nicely and expect to wait at the court house for most of the afternoon.  What it really turned into was a 5 minute trip into the court house where we were immediately called into a side room to answer about 10 questions from the judge about the adoption.  After firing off the questions one after the other she concluded by saying "the adoption is final; he is all yours."  That was it?  It was an awesome moment and a huge sigh of relief to know that he was officially ours!

What's next:  Our agency has applied for Micah's passport, and we are just waiting for him to have a physical prior to our case being submitted to the US Embassy.  The US Embassy will have our case somewhere between 2-8 weeks to do their own investigation to determine that Micah is a true orphan (this has already been done by the Ethiopian government).  Once the US government is convinced that Micah is a true orphan, we will "clear" Embassy and will then get word that we can travel back to Ethiopia to pick up our son.

We wanted to take a moment to thank everyone again for the overwhelming support that we have gotten from family and friends.  Our sheet fundraiser is ongoing and has helped us to fund our trips across the world.  We have spent time over the last couple weeks preparing our nursery for a second baby, and we hope to give you all good news soon that we will be bringing him home.  Also, Jana's cousin Hannah is finishing up a video of our trip!  We will not be posting this on the public blog, but please email us or check our Facebook pages in the upcoming days!

All my best,

Eric

And we got the call!!!!!!

Helllo All! 

It has been such a great week the Esden's!  We officially went off hold on June 20th.  For those that didn't know, with Elena's arrival we had to go on temporary hold for our adoption until Elena was officially 3 months old.  That of course happened on the 20th which just so happened to also be the day we got our referral!  Literally hours after Jana wrote an e mail to our agency reminding them that we wanted back on the waiting list they called with the great news.

Now, for those that don't know, a "referral" is the part of the adoption process where you are matched with your child.  We of course set "parameters" early on the process for what we felt was the best fit for our family (gender, age range, HIV positive or negative and so on).  Our request was for a healthy 0-12 month old boy or girl)  So Jana picks up the phone and see's that it is our agency calling.  We both think it is to confirm we are off hold but low and behold they have a referral for us!

So what did she say?  Well first we hung up the phone and called her back once we got Callie and Elena settled in.  We wanted to be able to listen intently to all she had to tell us......

........we were told there was a baby boy, 9 months old, healthy, and happy waiting to join our family!  She told us the little they know about his life then the best part, she told us she was going to send a picture for us to see, along with the rest of his information.  I of course couldn't wait to lay some eye on this little guy!  We hung up the phone after a few more minutes of talking with our agency and quickly opened up our e mails to await the information and picture.  We refreshed our inbox a couple hundred times and then it was there!  For the few seconds it took to open the picture (which felt like forever) neither Jana or I took a breath.  Then there he was.  Cute as all get out really!  Curly hair, happy face, healthy looking.  It was really a weird moment to finally lay eyes on something/someone you have been waiting so long for.  Below, although blurry, is the photo I made us take just after we looked at the picture.  Had to take at least one to document the moment right?  We really just looked at the picture for awhile and pointed out how awesome he looked.  Callie came in at some point and asked who it was.  When we told her it was her brother from Africa she clapped her hands with excitment and asked when he was coming!

After that the day was shot.  Jana of course was supposed to be working but we both walked around like in a daze, unable to put focus on any important task and somewhat in shock as to what just happened.  We called our parents and siblings then spent the rest of the evening talking about how cool the day was!

So what now?  Courts in Ethiopia close sometime in July or August for the rainy season, so we will not be making our first trip for court probably until October when they reopen.  After passing court, this little boy will official be considered our son in Ethiopia.  Then we come home and have to do a little more waiting until the US Embassy clears our case.  Then we go back and bring him home!  We still aren't done waiting but so glad to start this next chapter!

Jana and Eric

For all of those who give a sheet!

Wanted to take a moment and give a special thanks to all those that have ordered sheets or requested information about sheets.  Jana and I really appreciate the support from all!

Many have asked for more information about the sheets, so I have written some info below.  If you are interested in getting an order form to either place an order yourself or for others to order, please email me or Jana directly at eesden@yahoo.com or janalge@yahoo.com.  We will send you an order form that lists all the colors, pricing, etc.

Sheets:  They come in all sizes (twin, full, queen, king, california king).  The are 1200 thread count microfiber sheets.  Jana and I have sampled them ourselves and slept on them the last 2 weeks (washed in between week 1 and 2  :) ) and really like them.  I actually prefer them to our cotton sheets.

Cost:  All sheets, all sizes are $40.00.  For each set ordered, we will raise approximately $20 for our adoption fund.

Colors: Available colors include eggplant, sage, light blue, beige, chocolate, gray, navy blue, camel, white, black, mocha chocolate, and burgundy.  The order form that we send out lists all colors and shows a small sample of each color on the bottom of the sheet.

How it all works:  When 12 sheet sets are ordered, we purchase them from the company and they ship for free to any location we specify.  If you collect 11 sheet orders, we will also order you a set of sheets for no cost (to make 12) and have them shipped directly to you for you to distribute to your friends/family.  If you just want to order a set for yourself, we will ship out orders to any location and take care of the shipping cost ourselves.  

Thanks again to all that have inquired, purchased, passed on the word and so on.  We really appreciate it that you give a sheet!

Eric

All settled in.......

I know I say this every time......that I need to get better at this blog thing.....but at least this time I have an excuse.  It has been a bit crazy the last few months.  Although crazy, we have really enjoyed every moment we are spending as a family of 4.  At first it was hard to transition back into baby mode.  We had said goodbye to diapers, to being up at crazy hours of the night, or at least temporarily.  I don't know if it is because we are older now but the lack of sleep this time around is more difficult.

The transition from having only one child to two certainly was not without its challenges, but we seem to be getting into the swing of things and settling in.  Occasionally I work up the courage to ask a parent of 3 children how challenging it is.  Part of me wants to know what I am in for while another part is afraid to hear someone say it how difficult it could be.  Luckily the response has been mostly positive.  Of course having more children means more responsibility, but I find comfort in hearing that the hardest part for many parents is the transition from one to two.

So where are we in adoption world?  We have been on hold since the months leading to Elena's birth.  Although on hold, we continue to move up the waiting list and currently reside at number 8.  Just a few weeks ago, the couple at number 7 received their referral, so we are really on the cusp of the next chapter of this journey.  We have a meeting with our agency planned this week to discuss going back onto the list starting June 20th (Elena will be 3 months old) and literally a referral could come at any time once that happens.  Now don't go gettin' all excited.  The time between referral and bringing "baby in Africa" home could very well be another 6 months, but we find it refreshing to put this long and arduous waiting part behind us.  We can handle this next stretch for sure.

But with this new excitement and movement comes added cost and really the biggest chunk of financial strain in the whole process.  As most know, it is not cheap to adopt. Whether international or domestic it does not matter.  And at the time of referral a hefty chunk of money will come due to put the next chapter in motion. Since starting the process, we have had to commit to a different lifestyle and put a focus on saving, selling on Craigslist, and with the help of many family and friends, we also tried our hand at fundraising with an awesome garage sale last fall.   We are also members of a Facebook support group that includes other adoptive families within our agency.  It has proven to be a great resource and location for information-sharing that helps clarify how certain parts of the process work.  It was also a great resource for how to find creative ways to continue to fund raise and find ways to not be overwhelmed with the financial strain of the process.  It was from the idea of another friend that we decided to partake in a fundraiser that has proven most successful for many of our fellow adoptive families.

There is a company called Sanders Collection that is friendly with adoptive families.  This company manufactures microfiber bed sheets which are sold to retailers and also can be used in fundraising programs.  Jana and I gave the sheets a test run and we liked them.  Comfortable, soft, and in good quality.  They cost $40/set with no extra for delivery.  They come in a variety of sizes and colors.  For each set we sell, approximately $20 will go into our adoption fund. 

After a few days of printing, packaging, stuffing, and mailing, we plan on mailing out info on the sheets to family and friends to see if this could help raise some funds while helping others get a good nights sleep!  Keep a look out in your mailbox.  We tried to send out to those people whom we can't reach through social media, so if you don't get anything in the mail don't fret.  Shoot Jana or I an email or Facebook message if you are interested in some sheets, and we will take it from there. 

Thanks to all who continue to read this blog and follow our journey.  We appreciate the support through the process and general interest in our lives.

All my best,

Eric

Welcome Elena Faye Esden!!!

Well I guess this blog post is long overdue?  As most know by now we have welcomed yet another member to the family.  Elena was born on March 20th at 6:23am.  At 7lbs 1oz, she came rather quickly after Jana started laboring around 9pm the night before.

We really enjoyed Callie's birth, well as much as one can really but having Elena at home was pretty special.  In the days leading up to Elena arrival Jana had been quite uncomfortable having mild contractions every so often.  Things escalated on the evening of the 19th and as we laid down to bed it became quite clear that the show was starting.  Jana as always was amazing.  I really admire her focus and commitment to natural childbirth.  And to be able to birth at home just made the experience that much more incredible.  Jana's aunts Stephanie and Bev were here to help, along with my mother Lynn and Jana's cousin Sarah.  Everyone played their part and helped with the process.  Elena was born just after 6am, just in time for Callie to wake up and meet her new sister.


Bringing Callie in the room to meet her sister for the first time is something I will never forget.  With all the people in the room she was a bit shy, but crawled right over to Jana and Elena and was the best big sister the rest of the day.  Since then she continues to be very gentle and is interested in all things having to do with Elena, including changing diapers!

Having a newborn once again has been a sometimes hard, but fun change.  There are of course the nights of hardly any sleep and we have had plenty of those!  The biggest change is that instead of sleeping when the baby is sleeping (which is what we did with Callie), we are busy entertaining Callie and keeping her happy!  It is hard but so rewarding at the same time.  And to think, #3 is not far behind!  I see a lot of Starbucks iced coffees in my future!

We have had a lot of help from family since Elena has arrived.  Jana's aunt Bev is literally a saint.  She came days before the birth but also stayed nearly 2 weeks after to help with the transition.  My mother has also been awesome!  Having her own house just down the street is seriously so convenient.  Living alone in Florida and away family, Jana and I have gotten used to doing things on our own, but having some extra help now and again is nice too!

YOIKES!

After reading my last post that is really all I can say.....YOIKES!  There I was saying that I needed to get better at this "blog thing" and write on a more consistent basis and I go almost 2 months without a single entry! Yoikes!

Not much to report on the adoption front.  We are now number 15 and didn't move at all last month. Both Jana and I still think a lot about our impending adoption but have to be honest and acknowledge that most of our time these last few months has been spent getting ready for the baby in the belly.  Jana is 36 weeks, almost 37 weeks pregnant come tuesday and if I am not speaking out of place, she is ready for the pregnancy to come to the finale.  Personally, I think Jana does pregnancy very well but as we approach the finish line I can completly understand how woman look forward to sleeping on their bellies again, eating whatever they want, and essentially just having their bodies back.  There has of course been betting on when baby in the belly will make her appearance.  The due date is March 26th, but given the bumpy road of this pregnancy (it's surprising start, a resolved placenta previa) I have my bets on an earlier arrival as opposed to an ontime or late one.

All things are set for the new addition this month.  Room is done, Callie's old bottles, diapers, toys unpacked, and final arrangements are coming in place this week for our expected home birth.  We look forward to having Jana's aunts Bev and Steph, as well as my mother assisting with the birth.  Since Jana's sister Leah is also expecting (due date 2 days prior to Jana's) Jana's mother will be in Wisconsin helping with Leah's delivery.

(Jana-8.5 months pregnant with her mother Renee)

As we approach one finish line of growing our family Jana and I have tried to enjoy some of the last weeks we will have alone with Callie as a family of 3.  Trips to Disney with family, a day at the Strawberry Festival, vacations to the keys with grandparents, and even just quite days at home have kept us busy with Callie.  She says she is excited about seeing and meeting the baby in the belly.  I am positive she will be a great helper as we begin again at the starting line with diapers, broken sleep cycles, and bottle feeding......I guess good preparation for it to start yet again this coming summer when we bring home baby in Africa.......YOIKES!!!!!

 

Jana and Callie on the Teacups at the Magic Kingdom (January)

Callie watching the sunrise in Isla Morada, Florida-on vacation with Grandma and Grandpa Esden

 

Callie and Jana watch another sunrise toegether in the Keys!

 

 

Callie and Me on Big Thunder Mountain Railroad!  (Yes she road that)

 

Happy New Year! We are ready for 2013!

I need to get better at this blog thing.  Most people I see do an entry everyday, or at least once a week.  With the impending arrival of 2 new children, I highly doubt that will be achievable.  Regardless, a lot has changed and happened since out last entry.

Baby in the Belly: Jana is now over 28 weeks.  We have gone through a few hurdles over the past few weeks but are happy to say things are looking good.  Jana's placenta has been, shall we say, not so well positioned and since the 9 week ultrasound at a lower position in the uterus, one that is not ideal for a natural delivery.  With such, we had to have a follow up ultrasound at 20 weeks and again this week.  Can't say I was disappointed, as we were able to see baby in the belly moving all around in there.  With a sigh of relief, we got the results which showed the placenta is moving higher and higher which will allow for our planned home and natural birth!  With that worked out, we have started the planning for the birth and are excited that my mom and Jana's aunts Bev and Steph will be coming to help.

Baby in Ethiopia:  With such good news there is some I guess you could say "not good news" in relation to the adoption.  Since Jana is getting later into the pregnancy, we are approaching the time where she would not be able to travel to Ethiopia for court if we were to receive our referral in the coming months.  As you may have noticed from previous posts, things have really picked up.  We are now number 18, and move nearly 5-6 or 7 spots each month.   With these numbers and with the flexibility of our in referral criteria, we could easily be looking at receiving a referral in the coming month or two.  With this conflict, we had to go "on hold" until early summer at which time we will then go back at on the waiting list (probably at that time will be number 1) and hopefully quickly get a referral and start to next step of the process.  This would put us traveling to Ethiopia as early as August if all goes smoothly. 

Can't say we really know what would have been best here.  Part of us wanted to have the adoption finished before the arrival of biological baby but were scared to think of going from a family of 3 to a family of 5 so quickly.  It is surely disappointing to have to delay the process as this also means we have to update our home study and other paperwork, but this also gives us the time to focus on Baby in the belly, get settled into being a family of 4, then work on number 5.