The first 2 weeks

This post is long overdue.  Most know by now that Micah is now finally home and we have spent just about 2 weeks adjusting to being a family of 5.  We received word on 10/19 that our case had cleared, and we were on a plane on 10/21 to pick up our little guy.  Words can't express the relief we felt once that plane landed in DC and he was officially ours and officially a US citizen.  Of course it wasn't completely over, we still had 2 more connecting flights before landing in Orlando but just being in America with him in our arms was reason for relief and an end to this long and emotional process.

The 17 hour flight with a toddler was bad but really could have been worse.  He slept very little and most of the flight was spent with either Jana and I bouncing Micah in baby carrier called an Ergo in the area where the flight attendants make/prepare meals.  Perhaps our biggest challenge was his sheer size.  Until you meet him in person you don't really get a feel for his actual size.  He is a solid 28 pounds at 14 months and carrying him while in Ethiopia and on the plane did a number on mine and Jana's small frames......you know as I re-read what I write it makes it sound bad.  The point is we made it home after 29 hours of travel without a meltdown from either Micah or ourselves...that to me is success.

A lot has happened since being home.  I was so nervous for Micah's introduction into our family.....more so in the end then I truly expected.  How out Callie react?  Micah?  Elena?  The dog??  So many unknowns floating around in the air made it a nerve-racking but exciting experience.  Of course the intro couldn't have gone any better.  I will save the fine details of those first moments for our family's memories but I will tell you Callie has been an incredible big sister.  Just watching her interact with Micah for the first time so naturally melted all my worries away.  She wants to be involved in every aspect of his care from feeding, diaper changing, sleeping etc.  Jana and I have also gotten the chance to spend quality time with Micah as Jana's aunt Bev has been staying with us since his arrival doing house hold chores, cooking meals, and cleaning so we don't have to.  This time to really get to know him and him get to know us wouldn't have been possible without Bev's help.

There have been some bumps in the road.  Micah doesn't know "gentle touch" as it pertains to Elena so Jana and I have to maintain constant watch when the two are together to ensure Elena doesn't end up with a block to the head.  That will come with time. He also wants to be with either Jana or I 24/7.  That is such a good thing from a bonding point of view but he literally is attached to our hips. :)

Overall, we continue to adjust well.  Bev leaves this coming Monday leaving Jana and I to fend for ourselves. We are ready and will do just fine.  We so look forward to continue to get to know Micah and help our family adjust to the new addition.  We are all having a great time.  We have appreciated everyone's love and support so much through this process.  Its finally over!!  So happy....

 

and now we wait for the U.S. of A

Hello all-

We have officially been submitted to the US embassy and are awaiting for the United States government to approve our adoption.  This has been an exciting journey that got so quick-paced in the end.  We were hoping for a quick movement through the US side of things but it seems like staffing changed in the last 2 months, which might slow the process down just a bit. We were submitted to embassy on the 28th of August and still have not received notification that our case has been looked at. With our fingers crossed we still hope that Micah will be home within the month.

On a lighter note, Micah turned 1 on the 6th of September so we had a nice little birthday celebration for him.  Both my parents and Jana's mother are in town, so we sang him happy birthday and had a small cake with the colors of Ethiopia for decoration.  It was a tough day for both Jana and I, but it was softened a little by an update from our agency and some new photos of Micah.  He is doing well.  He caught a small cold and was seen by the doctor just to make sure there was no pneumonia.  He looks happy and heathy in the photos they send, even in one sporting some pink ruffled pants.  As long as he is warm and happy; that is the most important part.

Just the day after Micah's birthday, Jana's aunt Bev and mom threw us a "virtual baby-shower."  Now picture this,  here at our house we had all the gifts along with myself, Jana, the kids, Jana mother, my parents, and Jana's aunt and uncle.  We then Skyped in 3, (that is right), 3 different groups of people from various parts of the country to watch us open gifts in honor of Micah.  Everyone was so generous as we got clothes, toys, a new double stroller, and gifts for Callie and Elena.  We feel so fortunate to not only have such generous family and friends but also a support group that has really embraced Micah and our adoption.  Special thanks to Bev for organizing and suggesting the party.

So now we continue to wait some more.  All you can do is keep busy. Jana worked hard on a projects to get laminated posters of normal infant/toddler development for the nannies caring for the children.  Literally in 18 hours Jana was able to get donations from 9 different people to support this awesome project.  That is the kind of support we have gotten throughout this whole process and Jana and I couldn't be more grateful.

In closing all is going well with the girls.  Callie keeps asking when her brother will be coming home.  She has been so patient.  More so than us really.  Jana's cousin Hannah also made a video montage of our first trip.  Now let me warn you, I didn't make it but 15 seconds before I was balling like a child so get some tissues ready.  Hannah has a gift for not only taking photos but photo editing and developing things like this video.  You should be able to check it out by going to www.youtube.com and putting in Micah Mitik Esden for your search.  Happy Crying!

Eric

some more info to come.....

Sorry it has been a little quiet on here lately, but there is a lot happening.  We are in the Embassy portion of the process, and it is possible that Micah could be home in as little as four weeks.  I can almost feel that little boy in my hands, ready to join our permanent family.  Jana and I are so thankful for all the support we have received from everyone, but most importantly from our parents.  So many people have helped so much already to make Micah a part of our family and we couldn't be more appreciative!

Again, more info to come.........stay tuned.  :)

Introducing Micah Mitik Esden

This blog post is long overdue but things have been a whirl-wind since we got the call that we had a court date and needed to be in Ethiopia in a little over 1 week.  To bring you all up to date before sharing the details about our trip, Jana and I were not expecting to travel for court (our first Ethiopian trip) until October.  Courts close in Ethiopia in early August and the timeline just wasn't working in our favor.  Low and behold, we got an e mail telling us that somehow we were able to get a court date but needed to be in Ethiopia in just over a week!

We didn't even have time to process what was happening before we dropped Callie and Elena off at Jana's aunt and uncle's and boarded a plane to D.C. with a connection to Addis Ababa, Ethiopia.  We were lucky enough to have an overnight stay in DC and since neither Jana nor I have ever been there, we made sure to rent a car and drive downtown to see all the major sites.  The white house, Lincoln Memorial,  and the Washington Monument were all on our list and able to be visited before it got too dark.

The next day it was back to the airport for a later morning flight direct to Ethiopia.   The flight was 13.5 hours and allowed us time to get our heads together for what has become one the most incredible life-changing experiences of our lives.  Neither Jana nor I were able sleep, either because of sheer excitement or the fact that there is something that feels so unnatural about being in a giant plane flying over a huge ocean for such a long time (Nerve racking!).  We landed at 7am Ethiopian time (midnight east coast) and were exhausted.  Navigating the airport and baggage claim area was our first exposure to just how different life is like in Ethiopia in comparison to the States.  In general in America we have grown accustomed to organization and structure, something that was lacking with the simplest tasks like getting your luggage or forming a line to move through customs.  Once to the airport exit, we met Woudneh, our agency's director on the "Ethiopian side."  We had heard a lot of great things about this guy and all are true.   He proved to be one of the most sincere, patient, altruistic people I have ever met and is truly committed to the orphan and the adoption process in Ethiopia (the man does not take a day off...literally).

After leaving the airport, we were immediately exposed to life in Ethiopia.  In retrospect I am not sure what I was expecting to see.  Jana and I of course read about Ethiopian culture, history, and economy, but little can prepare you for extreme poverty and the severe living conditions.  I won't spend much time describing all that we saw (homeless men, women, and children, hungry children begging for a meal, livestock running free throughout the roads, extreme exhaust from overcrowded roadways....the list goes on). We were immediately brought to our guest house and given just enough time to drop off our luggage before we were told we would be heading to the transition house to meet our son.  The transition house is about 40 minutes away and is where all the children available for adoption stay as they transition from orphanage life to living with their families.  This was a weird 40 minutes.  We were dealing with complete culture shock, were severely jet legged, and had literally just met 3 other couples also coming with us to meet their children for the first time. It was exciting and completely terrifying at the same time.

After arriving at the transition house we had about 5 minutes to get prepared.  So many things were going through our heads.  Would he look like his picture?  How would he react?  How would we react?  Should we go right up and grab him?  Will he be nervous?  Before we knew, it he was there.  A nanny came around the corner holding him.....the cutest, most perfect, quiet, special, largest 11 month old I have ever seen.  I know I just stood there, partially so as not to startle him and make him uncomfortable but also in shock that this was finally the moment we had been waiting for.  Jana snapped out of it before me and following her motherly instinct walked in, offered her hand, and got him in her arms.  Of course the moment was perfect in every way, well as perfect as it can be with 6-8 strangers watching one of the most personal and unique moments of your life but I would be lying not to say there was also a little bit of shock, specifically with how large he was.   We had only seen 1 photo of him before our meeting, and Callie at 11 months was certainly not as large in comparison.  We didn't know for sure until a few days later when we weighed him but Micah weighed in at a whopping 25 pounds.  After meeting him we spent the next 2 hours getting to know each other.  He crawled, played with toys, and laughed.  He was quite yet curious and interested.  Such a special moment for us.

Each day we were there, they allowed 2 hours a day for us to play with our children.  This was hard for us as we wanted to be with him as often as possible but we grew to understand why they do this.  There is of course a lot to do while you are there (trips to orphanages, appear in court, etc) but they also don't want you to form too strong of bond yet have to leave your child for 3 months until the adoption is cleared by the US Embassy.  We made sure that the times we were together we took video and pictures as much as possible and enjoyed each moment.

The orphanages:  On our second day in country, our group was able to visit the orphanages where our children came from before being brought to our agency's transition house.  This was a few hours drive south to a smaller city called Adama.  We visited 3 different orphanages and were able to give donations like soccer balls, diaper cream, diapers, etc that we had all brought from home.  Each orphanage was a little different but all were filled with incredible kids happy for just a little attention or someone to play soccer with.  Micah's orphanage was one of the last we visited.  We were greeted by the woman who runs the orphanage and were told that Micah was one of her favorite children she had ever cared for.  We were able to visit for at least 45 minutes, and she told us about how Micah came to the orphanage, about his time while he was there, and she even showed us the crib he slept in.  She also made a loaf of bread that we cut in Micah's honor to celebrate his adoption into our family.  It was truly special.  There were also some younger children, maybe 4 or 5 years old, that Jana and I played with.  They were so captivated by our cameras and phones.  Seeing how excited they were to push buttons and watching them gather around us was one of the more memorable moments of our trip.

Court:  Passing court was probably one of the easiest parts of the trip.   We really didn't know what to expect.  We were just old to dress nicely and expect to wait at the court house for most of the afternoon.  What it really turned into was a 5 minute trip into the court house where we were immediately called into a side room to answer about 10 questions from the judge about the adoption.  After firing off the questions one after the other she concluded by saying "the adoption is final; he is all yours."  That was it?  It was an awesome moment and a huge sigh of relief to know that he was officially ours!

What's next:  Our agency has applied for Micah's passport, and we are just waiting for him to have a physical prior to our case being submitted to the US Embassy.  The US Embassy will have our case somewhere between 2-8 weeks to do their own investigation to determine that Micah is a true orphan (this has already been done by the Ethiopian government).  Once the US government is convinced that Micah is a true orphan, we will "clear" Embassy and will then get word that we can travel back to Ethiopia to pick up our son.

We wanted to take a moment to thank everyone again for the overwhelming support that we have gotten from family and friends.  Our sheet fundraiser is ongoing and has helped us to fund our trips across the world.  We have spent time over the last couple weeks preparing our nursery for a second baby, and we hope to give you all good news soon that we will be bringing him home.  Also, Jana's cousin Hannah is finishing up a video of our trip!  We will not be posting this on the public blog, but please email us or check our Facebook pages in the upcoming days!

All my best,

Eric

And we got the call!!!!!!

Helllo All! 

It has been such a great week the Esden's!  We officially went off hold on June 20th.  For those that didn't know, with Elena's arrival we had to go on temporary hold for our adoption until Elena was officially 3 months old.  That of course happened on the 20th which just so happened to also be the day we got our referral!  Literally hours after Jana wrote an e mail to our agency reminding them that we wanted back on the waiting list they called with the great news.

Now, for those that don't know, a "referral" is the part of the adoption process where you are matched with your child.  We of course set "parameters" early on the process for what we felt was the best fit for our family (gender, age range, HIV positive or negative and so on).  Our request was for a healthy 0-12 month old boy or girl)  So Jana picks up the phone and see's that it is our agency calling.  We both think it is to confirm we are off hold but low and behold they have a referral for us!

So what did she say?  Well first we hung up the phone and called her back once we got Callie and Elena settled in.  We wanted to be able to listen intently to all she had to tell us......

........we were told there was a baby boy, 9 months old, healthy, and happy waiting to join our family!  She told us the little they know about his life then the best part, she told us she was going to send a picture for us to see, along with the rest of his information.  I of course couldn't wait to lay some eye on this little guy!  We hung up the phone after a few more minutes of talking with our agency and quickly opened up our e mails to await the information and picture.  We refreshed our inbox a couple hundred times and then it was there!  For the few seconds it took to open the picture (which felt like forever) neither Jana or I took a breath.  Then there he was.  Cute as all get out really!  Curly hair, happy face, healthy looking.  It was really a weird moment to finally lay eyes on something/someone you have been waiting so long for.  Below, although blurry, is the photo I made us take just after we looked at the picture.  Had to take at least one to document the moment right?  We really just looked at the picture for awhile and pointed out how awesome he looked.  Callie came in at some point and asked who it was.  When we told her it was her brother from Africa she clapped her hands with excitment and asked when he was coming!

After that the day was shot.  Jana of course was supposed to be working but we both walked around like in a daze, unable to put focus on any important task and somewhat in shock as to what just happened.  We called our parents and siblings then spent the rest of the evening talking about how cool the day was!

So what now?  Courts in Ethiopia close sometime in July or August for the rainy season, so we will not be making our first trip for court probably until October when they reopen.  After passing court, this little boy will official be considered our son in Ethiopia.  Then we come home and have to do a little more waiting until the US Embassy clears our case.  Then we go back and bring him home!  We still aren't done waiting but so glad to start this next chapter!

Jana and Eric

For all of those who give a sheet!

Wanted to take a moment and give a special thanks to all those that have ordered sheets or requested information about sheets.  Jana and I really appreciate the support from all!

Many have asked for more information about the sheets, so I have written some info below.  If you are interested in getting an order form to either place an order yourself or for others to order, please email me or Jana directly at eesden@yahoo.com or janalge@yahoo.com.  We will send you an order form that lists all the colors, pricing, etc.

Sheets:  They come in all sizes (twin, full, queen, king, california king).  The are 1200 thread count microfiber sheets.  Jana and I have sampled them ourselves and slept on them the last 2 weeks (washed in between week 1 and 2  :) ) and really like them.  I actually prefer them to our cotton sheets.

Cost:  All sheets, all sizes are $40.00.  For each set ordered, we will raise approximately $20 for our adoption fund.

Colors: Available colors include eggplant, sage, light blue, beige, chocolate, gray, navy blue, camel, white, black, mocha chocolate, and burgundy.  The order form that we send out lists all colors and shows a small sample of each color on the bottom of the sheet.

How it all works:  When 12 sheet sets are ordered, we purchase them from the company and they ship for free to any location we specify.  If you collect 11 sheet orders, we will also order you a set of sheets for no cost (to make 12) and have them shipped directly to you for you to distribute to your friends/family.  If you just want to order a set for yourself, we will ship out orders to any location and take care of the shipping cost ourselves.  

Thanks again to all that have inquired, purchased, passed on the word and so on.  We really appreciate it that you give a sheet!

Eric

All settled in.......

I know I say this every time......that I need to get better at this blog thing.....but at least this time I have an excuse.  It has been a bit crazy the last few months.  Although crazy, we have really enjoyed every moment we are spending as a family of 4.  At first it was hard to transition back into baby mode.  We had said goodbye to diapers, to being up at crazy hours of the night, or at least temporarily.  I don't know if it is because we are older now but the lack of sleep this time around is more difficult.

The transition from having only one child to two certainly was not without its challenges, but we seem to be getting into the swing of things and settling in.  Occasionally I work up the courage to ask a parent of 3 children how challenging it is.  Part of me wants to know what I am in for while another part is afraid to hear someone say it how difficult it could be.  Luckily the response has been mostly positive.  Of course having more children means more responsibility, but I find comfort in hearing that the hardest part for many parents is the transition from one to two.

So where are we in adoption world?  We have been on hold since the months leading to Elena's birth.  Although on hold, we continue to move up the waiting list and currently reside at number 8.  Just a few weeks ago, the couple at number 7 received their referral, so we are really on the cusp of the next chapter of this journey.  We have a meeting with our agency planned this week to discuss going back onto the list starting June 20th (Elena will be 3 months old) and literally a referral could come at any time once that happens.  Now don't go gettin' all excited.  The time between referral and bringing "baby in Africa" home could very well be another 6 months, but we find it refreshing to put this long and arduous waiting part behind us.  We can handle this next stretch for sure.

But with this new excitement and movement comes added cost and really the biggest chunk of financial strain in the whole process.  As most know, it is not cheap to adopt. Whether international or domestic it does not matter.  And at the time of referral a hefty chunk of money will come due to put the next chapter in motion. Since starting the process, we have had to commit to a different lifestyle and put a focus on saving, selling on Craigslist, and with the help of many family and friends, we also tried our hand at fundraising with an awesome garage sale last fall.   We are also members of a Facebook support group that includes other adoptive families within our agency.  It has proven to be a great resource and location for information-sharing that helps clarify how certain parts of the process work.  It was also a great resource for how to find creative ways to continue to fund raise and find ways to not be overwhelmed with the financial strain of the process.  It was from the idea of another friend that we decided to partake in a fundraiser that has proven most successful for many of our fellow adoptive families.

There is a company called Sanders Collection that is friendly with adoptive families.  This company manufactures microfiber bed sheets which are sold to retailers and also can be used in fundraising programs.  Jana and I gave the sheets a test run and we liked them.  Comfortable, soft, and in good quality.  They cost $40/set with no extra for delivery.  They come in a variety of sizes and colors.  For each set we sell, approximately $20 will go into our adoption fund. 

After a few days of printing, packaging, stuffing, and mailing, we plan on mailing out info on the sheets to family and friends to see if this could help raise some funds while helping others get a good nights sleep!  Keep a look out in your mailbox.  We tried to send out to those people whom we can't reach through social media, so if you don't get anything in the mail don't fret.  Shoot Jana or I an email or Facebook message if you are interested in some sheets, and we will take it from there. 

Thanks to all who continue to read this blog and follow our journey.  We appreciate the support through the process and general interest in our lives.

All my best,

Eric